UPDATED: Catholic couple gives unconditional witness to parenthood, life
This updated version notes the birth of the babies on Oct. 11.
Gemma DeWitt gave birth to twins this October, which happens to be when Catholics celebrate Respect Life Month and the Month of the Rosary.
“We definitely believe in the power of prayers and blessings,” said Mrs. DeWitt, who lives near Martinsburg with her husband Aaron and their children.
“When you are faithfully praying for something, God grants your prayer if it’s for the best,” she stated. “We believed that quite a bit before, and I think that belief has now been cemented in our hearts.”
The DeWitts already had four children, ages 13 to 5, two of whom have special needs.
Mrs. DeWitt carries an extremely rare genetic mutation called Allan-Herndon-Dudley Syndrome (AHDS), which has a 1 in 4 chance of affecting any boy she gives birth to.
“The mutation basically prevents the thyroid hormone from passing through the baby’s blood-brain barrier during the first trimester in the womb,” the children’s father noted.
This leads to varying degrees of physical and developmental disabilities after the child is born.
“It severely limits their ability to move around and talk and basically be independent,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
The couple’s two children who have the condition cannot walk or speak.
Testing in the womb indicated that both twins — their names are Iosef Maximilian and Binjamin Pius — also have AHDS.
Dr. Roy E. Weiss, MD Ph.D., an endocrinologist and Chief Medical Officer for Ambulatory Services at the University of Miami Health System, treated Mrs. DeWitt with experimental medication throughout her pregnancy, hoping to reduce AHDS’s effects and allow the babies’ brains to develop in a healthy way.
This was first in utero application of this treatment.
Each Monday, the DeWitts pray their Family Rosary for the babies, their brothers and all children who have AHDS.
They also call upon the intercession of St. Joseph, St. Michael the Archangel and the Holy Guardian Angels.
They would love to witness a miraculous outcome, “but whatever God has in store for me and my family, that’s good enough,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
“There isn’t a thing that God hasn’t taken care of for me and my family,” she stated. “Every twist and turn, God has been right there in it.”
Being Catholic
The DeWitts have made a conscious decision to cooperate fully with God’s grace.
“I think God put us in this situation because we are a very pro-life family and we’ve always wanted to influence people toward being pro-life,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
“This might be a way for us to really do pro-life work for God,” she stated.
Radical faith is at the center the couple’s lives.
Mrs. DeWitt grew up Catholic but had become lukewarm in her belief and practice.
Mr. DeWitt was raised in a faith tradition that regarded Catholicism as “the devil’s church.”
They met while serving in the U.S. Army, at the Army’s LVN nursing school at Fort Sam Houston in San Antonio, Texas.
Mr. DeWitt was in a serious dating relationship when he caught sight of his future wife walking through the barracks.
“I heard a voice tell me, ‘That’s your wife, go marry her,’” he recalled.
The voice wouldn’t stop hounding him. The next week, he walked up to Gemma, introduced himself and told her what he had been hearing.
“We started dating,” he recalled. “And all of eight weeks later, we got married.”
That was 14 years ago.
“And because of Catholicism, our marriage is stronger than it could have ever been otherwise,” he said.
Mr. DeWitt originally figured that he would go with his wife to her church and then have her come to church with him.
“I didn’t think I’d have any trouble converting her,” he said.
“I must admit that I was a very lukewarm Catholic at that time,” Mrs. DeWitt noted. “I basically attended church because I was told it’s what I’m supposed to do.”
So, they went to Mass together.
“And there, before the Eucharist, I felt this indescribable, powerful presence,” said Mr. DeWitt. “It was very clear to me that ‘this isn’t Satan’s church.’”
He decided to become Catholic, enrolling in the Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults in their local parish.
They took part in the classes together, which awakened Mrs. DeWitt’s spiritual fervor.
She would later say to her husband, “I didn’t know what it was to be Catholic until I met you.”
“In God’s hands”
The DeWitts brought their first and only daughter into the world 13 years ago, followed by a son two years later.
Their second son just turned 8, and a third is now 5. Both of these boys have AHDS. They can do little for themselves, and their life expectancy is severely limited.
“We found a geneticist who had seen another case [of AHDS],” Mr. DeWitt recalled. “When she saw our boy after two or three years of his life, she said, ‘I think I know what it is.’”
She tested him, and the results came back positive.
Only about 500 people in the world have been diagnosed with AHDS. Few doctors are aware of it.
For Mrs. DeWitt, finding out that she carries this mutation was hard to accept.
“I was angry,” she recalled. “I was mad at God and mad at myself. All those negative emotions that I think the devil tries to play you with — they were all present in me.
“I almost felt like telling Aaron, ‘You should go find yourself a better person, because I’m defective,’” she said.
For a while, they decided to live as brother and sister, forgoing marital relations entirely.
“We were afraid of what would happen,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
They later discerned that being parents and bringing children into the world is the greatest gift they could receive in this life.
“We realized that we’re called to be parents and to have babies, and we agreed that that’s what we’re going to do,” said Mr. DeWitt.
“It’s part of the Sacrament of Marriage, and we were just going to leave it in God’s hands after that,” he stated.
What followed were three miscarriages, each about a year apart.
After each, the couple their babies and commended them to the hands of an all-loving God, in anticipation of being reunited with them in heaven.
“I thought for sure I was probably done having kids,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
Their priest offered to give her a special blessing.
“A couple of days later, I took the test, and it came out positive for pregnancy!” she stated.
They found out at their first OB/GYN appointment that they were having twins.
“I jokingly said to Father, ‘You weren’t supposed to use the plural in the blessing!’” said Mr. DeWitt. “He told me, ‘If I’d have used the plural, you’d be having quadruplets!’”
“A few tears”
The doctor tested to see whether either or both of the babies are male, and if so, whether they’re being affected by AHDS.
Mom and Dad were deeply shaken when the tests came back positive.
“We simply had to put all our trust in God,” said Mrs. DeWitt. “He loves us all and even though he gives us trials that seem to be overwhelming, if we rely on him, he can and will get us through.”
They looked to their fellow AHDS support group members and saw that each time there was a positive diagnosis in the womb, an abortion followed.
“(Dr. Weiss) couldn’t do any research, because he had nobody to help in this process,” Mr. DeWitt noted. “So, I can’t help but think that maybe this is one reason. Maybe it’s about saving babies.”
Specifically, if the experimental treatment in the womb is successful, it could help other babies who are diagnosed with the condition early enough in pregnancy.
It’s also about giving witness.
When a pro-life website posted a story about the DeWitts, several commenters attacked the couple’s good judgement.
Mr. DeWitt set about defending his family, beginning with excerpts from the Catechism of the Catholic Church.
“For us, every baby, every pregnancy we have, whether we’re talking about a child who’s very gifted or those who have difficulties to bear, we are taking part in the act of co-creating with God,” he insisted.
“And if we get to heaven, we can live with our boys who couldn’t talk and couldn’t walk in this life,” he said. “And maybe that day, we’ll walk with them and talk with them, and that will be a glorious day.”
Until then, some days are hard.
“I can tell you, it hasn’t been all pink balloons and roses,” said Mrs. DeWitt. “There have been quite a few tears and angry feelings every now and then.”
That’s when she turns to God and says, “Please Lord! Help me through this!”
She also asks the Blessed Mother, who also gave an unconditional “yes” to motherhood, to join her in supplication.
The whole family gathers each morning and evening for prayers and devotions, including a Family Rosary for various intentions.
Toward heaven
The twins were born by c-section on Oct. 11 in St. Louis. Iosef weighed 5 pounds, 14 ounces. Binjamin weighed 5 pounds, 15 ounces
Mr. and Mrs. DeWitt have learned so much from their children — the ones who have special needs and the ones who do not.
“Until we had our first child who has a disability, we didn’t know how to accept the kind of pure love God has in store for us,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
“I learned how to love, with them showing me what pure love is,” she said.
Their daughter has been like a second mother to her brothers with special needs, especially during Mrs. DeWitt’s pregnancy.
Their son who does not have AHDS plays with his brothers “and is probably the No. 1 source of laughter for them,” Mr. DeWitt noted. “He seems to know exactly how they want to play.”
The boys with AHDS have taught their parents a master course in being thankful and living in the moment.
“You learn to appreciate the very least of the things that God gives us — things you would otherwise likely take for granted,” said Mrs. DeWitt.
“The gift of having breath every day is amazing to me, now that I see them,” she stated. “Their lives, every day, one more day when we wake up, it’s a gift. I used to take all of that for granted, but not anymore.”
She talked about the elevated spirituality she recognizes in her sons with special needs.
“We believe that their souls are so pure,” she said. “We hope that we, too, can achieve that ultimate union with God in heaven with them someday.”
Both parents see God’s grace hard at work in their lives and in the lives of their children.
“Whenever we go down to St. Joseph in Westphalia for Mass, our older boy who has the syndrome, he really enjoys listening to the Gregorian chant and the choir,” said Mrs. DeWitt. “He looks up toward heaven and he smiles. It’s almost like he’s seeing angels.
“I wish I could see what they’re both looking at, because they seem so happy,” she said.
