Hannah Group, annual retreat offers peace, camaraderie to mothers of seminarians, priests
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Seminarians and priests don’t just fall out of the sky.
Each is born of a woman.
And in helping to nurture his priestly discernment, that woman finds joys and hardships that are best entertained in a community.
“You have women who are on the journey along with their seminarian sons, serving God in whatever way she’s being called,” said Jill Kliethermes, mother of seminarian, Shane Kliethermes, and founder of the Hannah Group. “We can learn from each other, we can lean on each other, and we can grow with each other.”
That’s the purpose of the Hannah Group and its seminal summer retreat.
“Gathering for prayer and fellowship brings friendship, companionship and a sisterhood that previously hadn’t been offered here before,” said Mrs. Kliethermes.
She recalled having never been to a priestly ordination before going Father Derek Hooper’s in the spring of 2021.
Her son had just entered priestly formation as a college sophomore, and felt hesitant, a bit out of sorts, as she approached the Cathedral.
“My heart longed to know the other moms and I didn’t,” she said. “So I was restless.”
Then-seminarian (now Father) Christopher Hoffmann greeted her during the reception.
“You know, Jill,” he suggested, “our moms ought to have a retreat together.”
“I said that would be beautiful and would give us a chance to get to know each other,” Mrs. Kliethermes recalled.
It took about a year, some further encouragement and quite a bit of collaboration for that idea to take full shape.
She mentioned the idea to Steve Meystrik, a high school classmate whose brother is Father Gregory Meystrik.
“Let me know what I can do to help you,” Mr. Meystrik told her. “My Mom would have loved to have that kind of connection.”
A few days later, Mrs. Kliethermes shared the idea with Margaret Oligschlaeger, mother of Father Gregory Oligschlaeger.
“Her response warmed my heart,” Mrs. Kliethermes recalled. “She said, ‘Let me know what I can do to help, I wish I had something like that when Greg first went into the seminary.”
She got a similar reaction a couple of weeks later when she discussed the idea with Michele Caywood, sister of Father John Schmitz.
“My Mom would have loved to be part of something like this,” Mrs. Caywood told her. “Would you like to use our Schmitz family cabin at the Lake for it?”
That was all the affirmation Mrs. Kliethermes needed.
“It’s a spiritual thing with me,” she said. “I wait for God to show me the way. Three [apparitions] has always been my number.”
Extended family
Mrs. Caywood called Fr. Schmitz, who is pastor of St. Patrick Parish and spiritual director of the National Shrine of Mary, Mother of the Church, both in Laurie.
Fr. Schmitz and several others agreed that the Shrine would be the perfect place for a mothers’ retreat, and that it would be best for the women to have their retreat while the seminarians attend their diocesan retreat.
Mrs. Kliethermes wrote to several Knights of Columbus councils, which agreed to underwrite the cost of the first retreat.
A handful of seminarian moms and priest moms attended the first gathering in Laurie that summer.
“Mary, our Mama, was front-and-center all over the place,” Mrs. Kliethermes recalled. “That’s how it all began.”
The following year, Mrs. Kliethermes sought support from parish and diocesan women’s groups, as well as Knights auxiliaries, which now financially support the annual retreat.
She searched for a proper name for the retreat and the related group that was taking shape.
She reached out to her friend, Kris Hartman, mother of then-seminarian (now Father) Jacob Hartman, and she suggested reading 1 Samuel 1:9-28.
“I prayed for this child, and the Lord granted my request,” Hannah says in that passage, “Now I, in turn, give him to the Lord; as long as he lives, he shall be dedicated to the Lord.”
Mrs. Kliethermes called Mrs. Hartman back, and said, “The Hannah Group,” and Kris replied, “I believe that would be perfect.”
The Hannah Retreat has become an annual event, with members of the Hannah Group using various events and technology platforms to stay in touch throughout the year.
“Each year, we bring Mama Mary and Hannah into the retreat,” Mrs. Kliethermes noted. “There’s always a lesson or theme to teach us moms something.”
She likened the naturally occurring fellowship to walking into a room, encountering a new face, a stranger, but no longer a stranger when both realize they are cousins.
“An instant bond is formed,” she said, “the same as when you meet another seminarian mom or priest mom.”
Father Anthony Onyeihe, pastor of St. Clement Parish in St. Clement, St. Joseph Parish in Louisiana and the Mission of Mary, Queen of Peace, in Clarksville, is Mrs. Kliethermes’s spiritual director for the retreat.
“He led three of our retreats, and he prays over the theme each year, before plans continue,” she said.
Fear not
The theme for this year’s retreat was “Wounded Love.”
“Everyone has wounds, but it is God’s love that heals, washes us clean, frees us,” said Mrs. Kliethermes. “Our Blessed Mother lived her life, free from wounds and carried her suffering with love.”
Kristi Cramer, mother of seminarian Samuel Cramer, said Adoration of the Most Blessed Sacrament followed by the Sacrament of Reconciliation was “the very definition of healing.”
“We’re being like Hannah, and we’re offering our sons to God to serve him in whatever way he sees fit,” she said.
The mothers spent time meditating on Mary’s holy obedience to God with her deep faith.
“Our Blessed Mother is interceding for us through all of this,” said Cathy Francka, mother of seminarian, Justin Francka. “We’re just asking her to help us be more like her in the way she loved and surrendered her Son.”
The Hannah Retreat culminated with Mass in St. Patrick Church.
Bishop Ralph B. O’Donnell presided, a delightful surprise to all who attended.
This year, Father Paul Clark, diocesan director of vocations and director of seminarians, surprised all the seminarian moms when he delivered their sons to join them for Rosary and Mass.
The mothers experienced great joy with having their seminarian sons next to them, for they all had been on summer assignments or leading diocesan summer camps.
Following the Rosary, the mothers of each seminarian came forward to place a long-stemmed flower at the foot of the statue of the Blessed Mother. Mothers of priests and sisters of priests whose mothers have passed on, then did likewise.
“As we pray together tonight, let’s be mindful of what a gift it is for the Hannahs to have each other to learn from, to pray with, to support and encourage,” said Bishop O’Donnell.
The evening ended with a home-cooked meal, directed by Mary Slater, sister of Monsignor Marion Makarewicz, and her husband, Gary Slater, along with Mrs. Caywood and volunteers from parish.
Connections
Mrs. Francka said the retreat helped her feel much more at peace with her role and that of her family in supporting her son in his journey.
“It’s given me some tools and some encouragement, peace and some help for my whole family to discern with him,” she said.
This was Mrs. Cramer’s third Hannah Retreat.
“It’s been such a wonderful walk in fellowship with these other ladies and having the priest moms here to support us,” she said.
She noted that there aren’t many other mothers who understand what it’s like to have a son discerning a possible priestly calling.
“It’s nice to be with people who have been on this journey and can help you anticipate the ins and outs of the seminary, the process and everything else that’s unique about it,” she said.
It also helps mitigate the fear of uncertainty.
“It’s a big deal to have your son considering the Priesthood,” Amy Sweeney, mother of seminarian Cameron Degraff, noted. “I think a lot of moms think of it in terms of losing a son or not having grandchildren.
“That’s why it’s so good to have other moms accompany us on this journey to support our sons and show us how much more of a family we’ll have if our sons do make that decision to enter the Priesthood,” she said. “Because he’ll be a spiritual father to so many people, and you’ll be part of that.”
Mrs. Sweeney’s son returned to seminary formation this year after taking several years to attend to his health. She wishes the Hannah Group had been around when he first entered the seminary.
“The nice thing about this group is that we have this connection with all these other moms now, so we have a network to reach out to,” she said.
Mrs. Oligschlaeger pointed out that from the beginning, her son has always made a point of including her and her late husband in his ministry.
“He’s such a happy priest, and he loves what he does,” she said. “I want it to be that way for every mother in this group.”
Mrs. Francka said making sacrifices with God’s help, to help men who are considering the Priesthood, is a tremendous joy.
“If you think of it really deeply, it can be a bit overwhelming,” she said. “Sometimes, I stop myself because it’s more joy than I can handle.”
Not alone
This was the second Hannah Retreat for Lynette Caro-Keegan, mother of seminarian Nico Keegan.
“I was deeply touched by how welcoming and kind the other mothers of seminarians were,” she said.
They created an atmosphere of warmth, openness and care that made it easy for her to feel included and at home.
“Their generosity of spirit, attentive listening, and shared faith transformed what could have felt unfamiliar into a truly comforting and uplifting experience,” she said.
Kathy Smith, mother of seminarian Bryce Smith, said she appreciated the advice from the priests who spoke at the retreat — namely to be like the Blessed Mother standing at the foot of the cross.
“Our roles transition from advising to listening, to being silent and to providing that sacred space our sons need,” she said. “And we turn to Hannah and Samuel to pray for and protect our sons as they face the joys and struggles ahead.”
Jennifer Neisen, mother of seminarian Gage Neisen, said the Hannah Group has opened her up to friendships that will last a lifetime.
“The group has been such a huge blessing for me, knowing that I’m not alone in this journey of becoming a priest mom,” she said.
“We have someone to share our son’s discernment with, to talk about how we are handling each step they are taking and getting guidance from the priest moms in our diocese,” she added.
Jerilyn McGuire, mother of seminarian John Paul McGuire, said it’s wonderful to be part of such a supportive community.
She said the Hannah Retreat was fun, relaxing and peaceful.
“By walking the journey together as moms with support for our boys, friendships happen,” she said.
Jean Eckstein, mother of seminarian Gabriel Eckstein, said the retreat gave her the spiritual and emotional support she needed.
“The other moms have been kind and inclusive toward me,” she said. “I know I can reach out with questions as they arise in this journey with Gabriel.”
Somebody to lean on
As the Hannah Group welcomes new members and moves forward with its purpose, Mrs. Kliethermes asks for prayers for God to guide the group according to his most holy will.
Mrs. Cramer asked for people to pray for her son and the rest of the seminarians and their families to be open to whatever God has in store for them.
“That openness has to be with the child, but it also has to be with the whole family,” she noted.
Mrs. Sweeney asked for prayers for whatever God wants for her son, not for what she or anyone else wants for him.
“I think that’s a good prayer for anybody who has children,” she said. “I just leave it at that, because I figure, the Lord knows the path he’s on much better than I do.”
Kyle Clark, whose son, Father Paul Clark was ordained nine years ago, asked everyone to remember that no matter who their priest is, he is someone’s son.
“And a mother and a father and a whole family have sacrificed so that he could be given to the Church to minister to us,” she said, “and that they deserve our respect, our prayers and our love, wherever he is.”
Mrs. Kliethermes looks forward to the day when dioceses all over the country have their own Hannah Groups, and when all four Missouri dioceses organize their own Hannah Retreats at the Mother’s Shrine in Laurie, “because Mama Mary’s presence is so prominent there.”
She believes giving seminarians’ and priests’ mothers a forum for enhanced camaraderie will help build up a culture of vocations throughout the diocese.
“We can strengthen, comfort and lean on one another for the journey, and this builds a community of faith.”
